If you read my last post here, you know that my sugar glider Dreamer was very sick. She ended up having surgery to remove the poop stuck in her colon. She wasn’t expected to survive the surgery because she was so small and it was so invasive. When they took her in, I prayed that if she was going to die from this whole mess, that it would just happen while she was in surgery so that she would be done with pain and so that we wouldn’t have any false hope about her recovery.
However, she made it through the surgery! We were absolutely thrilled. We were able to bring her home on Monday and I couldn’t believe how well she was doing. Her eyes were bright, she was fighting the body bandage (that kept her from reopening the wound site) and she ate and drank with great energy. I was so so thankful.
However, on Wednesday, she died. Her little body just couldn’t handle everything.
In the past, if that had happened, I would have probably been mad at God. Even though she was just an animal, she was a creature that I had chosen to love dearly and one that I had devoted many hours to caring for. She’d gone through many health struggles and that had bonded us together tighter because I had spent a long time caring for her and nursing her back to health.
But when it happened, even though I was very very sad, I wasn’t mad at all. In fact, I was really thankful that God ignored my prayer that she die in surgery if it was going to happen. I’m so thankful that he gave me those three extra days with her. It gave me a chance to take so many pictures and to record a lot of sweet memories. It allowed me to care for her one last time – to feed her, to make sure she got liquids and pain management. It allowed me to have those sweet last moments with her – to hold her for hours at night and to keep her warm and to know that she wasn’t alone, dying on an operating table. ❤ I’m thankful that I got to say goodbye. Goodbyes are so important to me and I don’t always get the chance to say goodbye to the things that I love before they’re gone. So yeah, it was special. ❤
It wasn’t a total shock. I’d been preparing myself for it ever since we took her into the vet in the first place. There was a little voice in the back of my head saying that she would die. And while I hoped it would be otherwise, I knew that if she didn’t die from this round of problems, another would come sooner or later and take her life. So as very sad as it was, I knew it was coming. I didn’t want her to continue to live in pain or to suffer the same problems over and over again. It wouldn’t be fair.
Do I wish that she was still alive? Of course I do. I really miss her a lot. Again, I know that she was just an animal, but I cared about her so very much. Animals touch special places in human hearts and heal certain wounds that cannot be cured otherwise. There is something so innocent and childlike about animals. Their complete and unconditional trust and love is beautiful and is a picture of how we should be with God. Animals teach many lessons and I do not think it wrong to love them or be sad when they die.
All that to say, I’m thankful for Dreamer’s life. I’m thankful for the lessons that God has taught me through her. And I’m thankful for the peace that I have right now. ❤
(If you want to see a bunch of pictures and such, I will be doing a post on my other blog here)