(I wrote this last night, but didn’t end up publishing it.)
It’s 6:50 and I am home, (mostly) alone. My parents and three of my siblings are out shopping at the moment. My other siblings are playing Uno upstairs. And me? I’m sitting blissfully alone in the living room, listening to the dishwasher. XD
I’ve been thinking for the past little bit….what do I enjoy so much about being alone with silence? And realized that really, I don’t like being alone with silence. I guess that kind of sounds like a contradiction to myself, but the reality is that I really dislike silence. During the very few and far between times that I’m actually completely alone, I’ll put on music or an audio or whatever. But rarely do I enjoy pure silence. Why? Because in silence, there is no where to hide. Everything I do, everything I say, I find fault with because there is nothing else that is canceling out the voices that tell me I’m a failure and I’m wrong.
Silence isn’t all together a bad thing, though. (Again, I sound like I’m contradicting myself….XD) I think….if we listen and seek God, we will find answers through the silence. And God will teach us things that we would never have learned otherwise.
Question two…Why do I like being alone? Well, when I’m alone, I’m real. That sounds weird now that I write it out. XD But being alone means that I don’t have to pretend anything at all. I’m me and no one else can judge me for the misfortune of that. Being alone means that I can think and pray without people. (Honestly, sometimes I just really dislike humanity.)
People, I love being alone waaaaaaay too much. But….WE NEED each other. As painful as that is to admit, it’s the truth. We were not created to live in our own little worlds, all alone. It’s true that people can and will hurt us, but it’s also true that people can bind up those wounds and help carry us onwards in life. God created us to need each other. And we can learn a lot through our families and friends (and even enemies sometimes).
So I say, let’s give humanity a chance. *Ahem* Wow, that sounded weird. XD Let me say that again….let’s give each other a chance. Let’s put down our devices and reach out to our family and friends. They need us…and we need them.